Dreams
Last night I had a dream. In the dream I was in a hallway…the hallway had 3 doors. Behind one door, Pippin Strano. Behind another, my mom. Behind the last, my Daddy. Everyone was asleep but me and my 3 dogs (my 3 dream dogs, not my real dogs). I slowly opened each door and climbed up the stairs…looked at each person sleeping. After I had gone through all 3 rooms I had to decide who I’d spend my life with.
I never got to see what my choice was. My Daddy woke me up this morning because I overslept and he was getting worried about me.
It was a hard choice, even in my dream world. I thought my Daddy would automatically win, but he didn’t. I imagine it’s because all 3 of them are very important, influential people in my life. Maybe I’m not meant to choose any of them. Maybe I’m supposed to stay out in the hallway, able to move between the 3.
Pre-breaking up
My Daddy and I had a really hard talk last night. It all started because I told my Daddy I wanted to get married and have a family and those weren’t things I could do with him…3 hours later I had cried a bajillion tears and my Daddy was talking me to sleep.
I want to marry someone…someone who isn’t already married…and I want to have kids…but I still want my Daddy. In fact, I want all of these things from my Daddy. But my Daddy knows that by the time I’m his age he’ll be “high maintenance.” In effect, he’s not marrying me for my own good.
He did make me a promise, though. He promised he’d make every effort to dance at my wedding.
Last night, I realized just how amazing my Daddy really is and just how lucky I am to have him. He had asked for monogamy and I agreed to it…it was a condition of wearing his collar. Last night he told me that eventually we’ll figure out a way to have me date other people…but he’ll always have a say. 
He’ll always be my Daddy.
I don’t exactly see how I’m going to find someone worth marrying…I have pretty high standards now.
My Daddy also talked to me about why I didn’t think I could be in a monogamous relationship when I’m married…I’m not quite sure. I guess it’s because I have a hard time believing that one person can meet all of my needs. I mean, even as amazing as my Daddy is, not even he can meet all of my needs. He may be able to meet them for a while…as long as I don’t expect marriage or kids, but he can’t meet them forever. And I always want my Daddy in my life, so my future husband needs to be ok with this.
I guess I’m going to have to learn to be ok with my Daddy being with another woman if I’m going to be with another man.
So I guess this is it. My Daddy and I have pre-broken up. We’re still together and we still love each other, but we both know this isn’t meant to last.
It’s something I’ve mad…
It’s something I’ve made peace with, but every so often the truce get’s broken.
-talking about my Daddy’s relationship with his wife
I may take you in the thr…
I may take you in the throat, I may take you in the pussy, I may take you in the ass…but I will never take you for granted.
-Things Daddy J says
Walk 2 miles for a toothb…
Walk 2 miles for a toothbrush
- Things my Daddy has me do -.-
Routines
Daddy J has decided that I need a routine every night. I wasn’t exactly thrilled about having a bed time, but I’ve come to enjoy it. Every night, or as close to every night as possible, Daddy J tucks me in. I love looking forward to that every night. When I’ve had an absolutely crazy day I know that my Daddy will tuck me in to bed that night and make everything better.
After he tucks me in, which happens around the same time every night, I get to stay up for about an hour and a half longer. There are, of course, exceptions to this routine. Occasionally, I’ll have some sort of social function. In that case, I may or may not get tucked in and lights must be out within 30 minutes of getting home.
I don’t enjoy the idea of lights out. I’ve gotten so used to sleeping with something playing on my laptop. The idea that I might stay up long enough to have to fall asleep in dark silence is not a nice one. For as long as I can remember I’ve gone to bed with a tv on.
We’re less than a week into our routine and overall I’m enjoying it. Daddy was right. I need adequate rest if I’m going to succeed in my courses this semester.
I’m not topping from the…
I’m not topping from the bottom…I’m bottoming from the top.
- Stupid things I say when it’s past my bedtime.
We will be ok….
We will be ok.
-Things Daddy J says
Wearing his collar…
Daddy J asked me to write an essay on what wearing his collar would mean to me. After nearly a month this is what I came up with:
Daddy,
I see wearing your collar the way most people see wearing a wedding ring. It is a symbol of our love for each other. As a part of that love, I will give you control of my life. I will trust you to help me make the right decisions and keep me safe.
Your collar is a promise. It’s a promise to love unconditionally. A promise to accept our faults and our strengths. I know it’s a big promise. It isn’t something I take lightly. I know that it will take time to reach this level in our relationship. I understand that this is not something to rush into.
Wearing your collar says that I belong to you. It says that my Daddy loves me so much that he has claimed me as his. It says that I trust you enough to give you control of my life.
Allowing me to wear your collar would make me the happiest little girl in the world. I told you once that I wanted unconditional love. I meant it. Your collar symbolizes that. It means that after much thought and careful consideration you have decided that I am worth making a commitment to.
I told you of the natural progression a relationship follows…I imagine that this would be our next step, should you so choose. Up until now I’ve held a large degree of power in my life. I’m ready to hand that power over to you, my Daddy.
This power will have boundaries, of course. Boundaries unspoken. Boundaries I trust you not to cross. Boundaries I know you will not cross because of your very nature. You’re main concern has always been my safety, both physical and emotional. You’ve been my protector, mentor and guardian. You’ve been the one I’ve come to when I’m facing a tough decision. Yours is the voice that calms me. It is because of this that I feel confident in handing over my power to you.
In return for your collar you can expect your loving little girl to be by your side for as long as you’ll have me (and possibly a bit longer). I promise you complete honesty, faithfulness and trust. I will tell you when I’m scared and trust you to keep me safe. I will fill your life with wonder and sweetness. I will be your ray of sunshine, your place of peace, your safe haven. I promise to be your island of tranquility in a sea of chaos and uncertainty. I promise to obey, maybe not the first time, but definitely after the look.
After our first night together you gave me the power to end our relationship if it became too painful for me to handle. Accepting your collar would mean giving that power back. It means accepting the pain and the pleasure, in whatever form they may come.
Daddy J read this last night. He said that it wasn’t too far off from his own thoughts, but that he’d like some time to think about it.
Tickling
I very foolishly sent Daddy J this link: https://fetlife.com/groups/469/group_posts/1988604
He texted me that he had one definite conclusion after reading the thread…I need to learn to love the gag.
Oh geez…what did I get myself into???
And just now he called me to further explain. In the discussion they mentioned something about razors or some such…
Hey, dimpletoes, try the mens remington grooming trimmer. take the head attachment off and use that lil spinning pin inside on the soles of his feet:) he will scream, and you will giggle. Trust me, it will bring him to hysterics! Good luck, sweetie:)”
So…apparently Daddy J has one that works very similarly to the one referenced in the post…
Daddy J went on to say that our current restraints were no longer enough…and that he was home.
My mind is racing with all sort of crazy thoughts…a part of me is glad we won’t be seeing each other for a month. Daddy J has a mind like a rusted steel trap 
For some reason, I seriously doubt he’ll forget this. :/
