Change is coming. It’s basically guaranteed in a relationship that involves two other people. I’m not sure how I feel about this particular change yet. It reminds me of the saying, “If you want to change, you have to be willing to be uncomfortable.”
Admittedly, I’m not the one primarily impacted by the change, but I really don’t do well with change. I do better when I’m prepped for it, but I still don’t do well. Change scares me. It’s different. I get the feeling that this change will be better for everyone involved in the long run, but right now it just kind of sucks.
Daddy decided to tell his daughter about me and his Ginger Mouse. His daughter came to visit him for a bit, which is really great. He definitely missed her and needed to see her. Through a series of unfortunate events, she discovered that I was on the reservation. She asked who I was and just said that I was a friend that had stayed with him this weekend. Daddy said that she didn’t bring it up again and that was that.
Until last night. Last night he texted Ginger Mouse and I and said that he had finally told her about both of us. He was tired of hiding us from someone that he loved so much. He didn’t tell her everything, of course…some things a daughter just doesn’t need to know about her dad, but he told her quite a bit. He even told her that Ginger Mouse and I had become friends!
So, now I prepare to be cyber stalked. Facebook is fully locked down. My tweets aren’t, but that should be fine. I know she will not be checking Fetlife (thank goodness!). Thankfully, my name is common enough that I shouldn’t be too easy to find…Ginger Mouse on the other hand has a rather unique name. Best of luck to her. ;-)
Daddy came up to spend the weekend with me at the Food and Wine Festival. It was a weekend of continuous food coma and I loved it. He drove up Friday night just a few minutes after I had finished packing. After a good night’s sleep and a bit of play, we went over to Hollywood Studios to draw Eeyore! It’s one of my favorite things to do at Disney. Unfortunately, I don’t really like much else at HS, so we headed over to Epcot for lunch. After a few stops, we decided to head back to our room for a bit.
Dinner was just as awesome. Daddy had made reservations at Epcot at a place with some rather strange food. I ordered chicken, which I thought would be a safe choice, but it was green! It was delicious, but it was green.
Just after we left dinner we ran into some friends from grad school. That was interesting to watch. My Daddy’s really good at striking up a conversation with just about anyone. It’s no surprise that this was no different. Daddy got to hear what my friends think of me in a professional setting, but they definitely talked me up too much. Yes, Daddy has met my friends before. He’s even invited a few to lunch, but he’s never met anyone that has seen me in a clinical setting.
After a few more stops for dessert, we headed back to our room to recover. I took a bubble bath while Daddy spent some alone time with his Ginger Mouse. By the time my fingers were all prune-y, Daddy was sitting out in the living room still talking to her. I got so freakin’ excited when I realized he was talking to her. I climbed right onto his lap and begged to be included! So, we Skyped her! After I had talked to them for a bit, Daddy sent me back into the shower so he could finish talking to her alone. That kind of sucked, but I guess it’s fine. Daddy and I had to have a long talk that night about boundaries and setting proper expectations. It wasn’t because he was upset that I had joined in, it was more about him wanting to make sure that I understood that we all needed some alone time with each other sometimes. I understand the concept, I just can’t imagine ever having a conversation with Daddy that I wouldn’t want his Ginger Mouse to join in on, which makes the reverse equally difficult for me to grasp. It was actually pretty difficult for Daddy to explain it all to me.
Sunday was basically one long, continuous food coma, too. It started off with breakfast made by Daddy and ended with a Brioche and ice cream sandwich in France. Then Daddy had me buy some bath bombs so I could take another bath, without bubbles this time. That was followed by a nap and then play time! I got to try the violet wand for real this time. I had tried it Saturday night, but I was so scared I was in tears even though I could barely feel anything. So, Sunday night, he tied me up and blindfolded me and let me try it a second time. I was able to enjoy it a bit more and Daddy was constantly asking if he was hurting me. Eventually he let me see again and I kept telling me that he was hurting me with scared, which just made him laugh a bunch.
Overall, it was a good trip. I hated having to come back home Monday morning, but I’m glad I got to spend a weekend with my Daddy.
She snuck into our lives so quietly, this Ginger Mouse. Just a simple message on a dating site is all it took. It must not have seemed like such a big step to her. She’d probably meet a guy, have lunch with him, maybe even sleep with him, but how could she have known she had just written to the man that would become her Daddy. How could she have known he’d have his own little girl already who was just bursting with excitement at the thought of her?
My Daddy’s Ginger Mouse has been in our lives for about a month now and I can hardly imagine a time without her. I feel as though she just fits so perfectly in our lives and our relationship. I cuddle on Daddy’s right and she cuddles on Daddy’s left. She’s always willing to talk to me and tolerate me, which is no easy task. She’s still so new at BDSM and poly, but she’s trying her best to take the giant leaps I want her to take instead of the baby steps Daddy says are best for her. We talk about Daddy and our relationships with him all the time, which I really love. I want to know all about her relationship and she’s slowly opening up about it. She’ll answer most of my direct questions, which is so sweet of her because I know she doesn’t have to answer any.
Pretty soon, Daddy and his Ginger Mouse will travel somewhere together. They’ll spend a few days together the same way Daddy and I spend days together. They’ll be together and I’ll be alone and that kind of sucks. I really wish I could join them, but that would be rude and I have classes and clients to think of. It’s good for them to spend extended amounts of time together. Ginger Mouse does such a great job of helping me feel included. I might even say that she does a better job than Daddy does, though that’s only because Daddy is so focused on his work stuff.
Sometimes I feel like I’m intruding on their relationship, but she’s just so welcoming.
It’s been a while since Daddy and his Ginger Mouse started their relationship. It’s been rough at times. I cry when he gives her more attention than me. She cries when he and I are together and she feels left out. My Daddy is left wondering what the heck he’s gotten himself into…
But things are looking up. Her and I have started talking to each other quite often. My gosh, she’s perfect. She’s so sweet and welcoming. She just let me into her life. We spend our day texting each other, sending selfies and talking about Daddy.
Yesterday, she spent most of the day with Daddy. I thought I’d feel ignored and left out, but I felt the opposite. She wrote to me all morning before she went to see Daddy. She wrote to me whenever Daddy was busy working. Her and Daddy even Skyped with me for a bit while I was at work! I loved seeing them together! She looks so perfectly content with him. I loved seeing that smile on her face.
Then they spent the rest of the day together and sort of ran into my Skype time with Daddy…so they both Skyped me again! I was so excited.
My feelings really could have gone either way with Skype. I’ve never been in that situation before, so I could have gotten really jealous or something, but instead I was just happy to see both of them be so happy with each other.
So, even though we had a bit of a rocky start, I think we’re all in a really good place right now. I can hardly believe that her and Daddy found each other. How lucky can one guy be?
My Daddy has another submissive. I don’t know that little girl is the right term for her, but she does call him Daddy. She’s cute and sweet and perfectly adorable, but she’s new to kink. She’s new to poly. She’s new to us.
I liked her before I spoke with her. Now that I’ve gotten a chance to know her myself, I absolutely love her.
So why do I struggle with their relationship? Could this be what jealousy feels like? What am I even jealous of? Maybe I’m jealous that she gets to spend time with him in person, while I have to settle for nightly Skypes and a few trips together a year. I don’t think that’s quite it, though it’s certainly possible.
Do I think my Daddy will leave me for her? No. I’m quite comfortable in our relationship. My Daddy has worked hard to make sure I know our relationship will not be harmed by theirs. He’s actually really good at making me feel comfortable about him seeing other women. I actually feel better now that he seems to have started a relationship, as opposed to having various play partners.
So why have I been crying for the past 2 days? I think part of it is that she’s not comfortable sharing the details of their encounters. That would be fine, except I love hearing those details. My Daddy tells me everything that goes on when he’s with someone else. It helps me feel included. It helps me feel comfortable. It lets me know that I’m important.
But she’s not everyone else. She’s not Daddy’s play partner. She’s someone that Daddy is starting a relationship with. She’s someone that I’d like to be friends with. Maybe I’ve been spoiled by Daddy’s willingness to share all sorts of details with me. I have a warped sense of what’s considered normal, that much I know for sure. I’m much more comfortable sharing intimate details than other people are, I’m finding out.
Daddy has always said that no new relationship would hurt ours. He’s made sure I understood that my relationship with him would always come first. But why should it? Shouldn’t this new relationship have as much of a shot at success as my relationship with him?
It doesn’t matter anymore. Daddy is going to speak to her and say…who knows what. From what he said, it sounds like he’ll be telling her what I need to be comfortable. So why am I not happy? I think it’s because I feel as though I’ve negatively impacted their relationship. I don’t want to come between them. I really want things to work out with her. She’s so cute and sweet and perfectly adorable.