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The Things I Wish I Said

January 11, 2010

I wish I could tell him to make me cum. Its been more than a month since the last time I came. This is torture.
Last week I started looking for my vibrating razor because I was going to masturbate. Yes, I know. I promised you I wouldn’t. Honestly, its been way too long. I couldn’t stand it anymore and I figured any punishment you gave me would be worth it. But I couldn’t find it. I don’t know where I left it. So now, I actually can’t orgasm! I tried touching myself, but I’ve never done it before so I suck at it! I don’t even get close. Today, when you came over I thought you’d eat me out until I came…but you didn’t so much a lick my clit.

Last time you said that when you got a condom you’d let me rock your world. You brought condoms today. I put one on you. I started fucking you. Then you told me to switch with you. I wish you knew how heart broken I was. I was trying very hard to make you cum. Yet you would rather sweat and be out of breath than let me be on top. I wanted to make you cum…more than I wanted to orgasm. But you didn’t care. You took over. You didn’t care that I had been waiting a week to make you cum.

Most importantly I wanted to tell you that I needed money. I wanted to tell you that our electric bill was due last friday. I wanted to tell you that our rent was due on the first. I wanted to tell you that we have no money to buy food. We have no money to pay for gas. We have no money to buy my books for school. I wanted to ask you for money. I considered it for a long time. In the end I decided that I wouldn’t accept money from you. Not because we don’t need it, but because once I get the courage to talk to you about these things, I don’t want you to think I’m asking you for money every time. Sometimes I just need someone to talk to. I can’t wait until that someone is you.

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