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May 14, 2010

As punishment for being so foolish yesterday my boyfriend has decided that I must now go out and meet a girl.

He’s right to punish me. What I did was extremely foolish. But surely he must realize that I was just as foolish with him…that I still am. And honestly, I don’t want to meet anyone anymore…this whole experience really scared me. It made me realize just how bad I am at judging people.

My boyfriend took it all suprisingly well. He was upset, obviously. He asked me how I would have been able to face him knowing I had given my body to someone else. That really made me feel awful. I started crying when he asked that because I realized that I had hurt him. But then he told me that I’m not just me anymore, I’m us. That sort of made me feel better. I wish I could have buried myself in his chest and never come out.

I wish I could write more, but I have to go find a girlfriend. 😦

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