My Daddy and I had a really hard talk last night. It all started because I told my Daddy I wanted to get married and have a family and those weren’t things I could do with him…3 hours later I had cried a bajillion tears and my Daddy was talking me to sleep.
I want to marry someone…someone who isn’t already married…and I want to have kids…but I still want my Daddy. In fact, I want all of these things from my Daddy. But my Daddy knows that by the time I’m his age he’ll be “high maintenance.” In effect, he’s not marrying me for my own good.
He did make me a promise, though. He promised he’d make every effort to dance at my wedding.
Last night, I realized just how amazing my Daddy really is and just how lucky I am to have him. He had asked for monogamy and I agreed to it…it was a condition of wearing his collar. Last night he told me that eventually we’ll figure out a way to have me date other people…but he’ll always have a say. 🙂 He’ll always be my Daddy.
I don’t exactly see how I’m going to find someone worth marrying…I have pretty high standards now.
My Daddy also talked to me about why I didn’t think I could be in a monogamous relationship when I’m married…I’m not quite sure. I guess it’s because I have a hard time believing that one person can meet all of my needs. I mean, even as amazing as my Daddy is, not even he can meet all of my needs. He may be able to meet them for a while…as long as I don’t expect marriage or kids, but he can’t meet them forever. And I always want my Daddy in my life, so my future husband needs to be ok with this.
I guess I’m going to have to learn to be ok with my Daddy being with another woman if I’m going to be with another man.
So I guess this is it. My Daddy and I have pre-broken up. We’re still together and we still love each other, but we both know this isn’t meant to last.